For those days you feel burnt out...

Happy Tuesday Friend,

Some friends of ours came over this weekend as they do almost every weekend, but right away I could tell something was a little “off.” 

It was almost like the spark was gone. 

My friend, normally so fun and happy and full of life, was quiet and withdrawn. Truth be told, she looked utterly exhausted.

I asked if she was okay, and she said she was fine, just a little tired.

We’ve been friends long enough that I didn’t take it personally, and for a long time, we just sat there staring at the fire, listening to the rain come down on the metal roof of our screened porch.

After a long time, she finally spoke.

“I just can’t keep up,” she said, “work has me running ragged, and there’s just so much to do all the time. And now with my mom being sick, I feel like I need to be there for my parents more than ever, and I don’t know where I’m going to find the time. I feel like I’m burning out.”

I wish I could tell you that I gave her some life-changing piece of advice, some golden nugget that turned things around and made her feel okay.

But all I could do was listen. Hopefully, that was enough.

And honestly, I’ve been burned out enough in my own life to know that sometimes there isn’t an easy answer.

But here’s what I do know: life can sometimes kick our butts when we’re least expecting it.

All of a sudden obligations stack up, and we get overwhelmed and run down, and all it takes is one more little thing to put us over the edge. The proverbial last straw.

And if you don’t know the signs to watch out for, you might be setting yourself up for disaster.

So what are some of the signs you might be burning out? Here are five big ones:

1. You feel tired all the time. It doesn’t matter how much sleep you get, you just feel totally run down and chronically exhausted.  All you want to do is go to bed.

2. Everything irritates you. Your spouse. Your kids. Your boss. Your friends. The world at large. When did everyone get so annoying? You feel angry and agitated almost all the time—like you’re just on edge.

3. You feel depressed, anxious, or hopeless. You can’t shake the feeling that there’s just no light at the end of the tunnel. Everything feels like an endless grind, and there’s no end in sight.

4. You’ve lost your creativity. The spark is gone. You’re fresh out of new ideas, and you barely remember how to tap into that part of yourself. Was it ever there to begin with?

5. You’re having trouble sleeping. Despite your exhaustion, you toss & turn all night long, or wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat.

The truth is that burnout is REAL, especially if you’re a mom or just have a lot on your plate, and the first step in making it better is actually recognizing the signs before it all comes crashing down.

The second step is a little harder….you gotta do something about it.

Sometimes that might be sitting in front of a fire and venting to a friend. 

But chances are, you’re going to need something more.

I know for me, that when I feel burned out, it’s a big sign that I’m spending too much time reacting and responding to other people’s needs and not enough time pursuing the things that matter to me, the things that light me up and give me energy and joy.

And so while it might feel selfish to focus on your own needs first, it’s actually not.

Audre Lorde once said, “Self-care is not an indulgence; it’s self-preservation.”  In that same vein, Brené Brown said, “talk to yourself the same way you would talk to someone you love.”

In other words? You gotta put on your own air mask before you can help other people.

Whether you’re feeling burned out or not, my challenge for you this week is to do something just for you, something that lights you up and fuels your fire. Not because you have time, but because you need it like you need air to breathe.

You deserve a full cup.

Live with purpose, friend, and have an amazing week!

xoxo, Ruth

P.S. I’d love to hear back from you! Just hit reply to this email to let me know what you’ve been up to, and what you’re focused on right now!

This week’s podcast episode…

What I’m loving & learning right now…

• Today I taught the first One Day Intensive for our new EBA® Powerhouse program. It was SUCH A GOOD DAY! We covered finding your why, identifying your Dream Customer, discovering Blue Ocean Opportunities, what it means to create a movement for your brand, and how to map out your product ladder. Aside from a few small technical issues with Zoom (thanks Polar Vortex) the day couldn’t have gone any better. I can’t wait for our next intensive!

• I’m re-reading a classic, Think & Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill. It’s basically the original self-help book, and if you need a kick in the pants to get your mindset in the right place, this will do it!

The latest from my Instagram…

One of my goals this year is to be more consistent on social media, so I’ve committed to sharing at least one post a day on Instagram. If you’re there, I’d love to connect with you—find me at @RuthSoukup

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